Article posted Thursday, May 1, 2014 10:47am

Dear Mary Pat,

My friend spends WAY too much time on her iPhone. Whenever we get together for coffee, a drink, a movie night, she’s constantly on her phone. She is either posting about what we are up to on Facebook, filtering selfies on Instagram, or sharing her thoughts about what we are eating/drinking/watching on Twitter. If she’s not on social media, she’s texing. Why can’t she just be in the moment with me and put the phone away?!

It’s come to a point where I don’t event want to invite her along lest my life be broadcasted across the internet. Further more, I think this behavior points towards a bigger psychological problem in my friend, like extremely low self-esteem.

What do I do?

Signed,

Phone Overload

Sister Bay, WI

Dear Phone Overload,

I just heard about a statistic that claims smartphone users look at their phones an average of 150 times per day. An AVERAGE of 150 times per day. That’s a lot of time. There are a lot of us guilty of this and just like any bad habit, it takes discipline to break it.

It’s one thing to look at your news feed or a couple of pictures throughout the day, it’s another to obsessively post what you are doing. Social media can be such an incredible way to share information. When there is truly something special to share, such as a new baby in the family or a beautiful sunset on a trip, it’s so nice to have a format to do so…with your closest 842 friends. However, social media can also be a platform for narcissists. Trust me when I say that no one cares to know about all three of your meals on any given day. There is one friend I have on Facebook that would never need to be tracked by GPS since he posts every detail of his day complete with latitude and longitude.

It is time to have a conversation with your friend. Let her know that you would like her full attention when you are out together. Also let her know that you aren’t comfortable with her posting details about you online without your permission. She will hopefully be able to understand. I don’t know if she has low self-esteem, she is bored or just simply addicted. That’s something that she will have to work out on her own. Depending on her response, you will have to work out how much time you can spend with her.

Good luck,

Mary Pat