Christmas Ch-Ch-Changes

This is how I spent my Christmas last year. This year’s Christmas promises far fewer fake cacti.

Recently, my Christmases have fallen victim to what I call my “mid-twenties flux.” Basically, as the ground of my life has been constantly shifting beneath my feet, a lot of the things I used to take for granted have begun to disappear.

Christmas traditions have been a noticeable part of that lot of things.

The most extreme example is last year, when I didn’t spend Christmas in the country. My girlfriend and I were teaching English in South Korea at the time, so instead of visiting with friends and family we flew to an island at the southernmost point of the country for an extended weekend.

But, now safely back in the great state of Wisconsin, it’s the little things that have been nagging at me this year.

Gone are the days when everybody had presents to open at each of my grandmothers’ households on Christmas Eve. Our families are getting too big to do that. One of my grandmas can’t host our family gathering anymore, so it’s been rotating throughout my aunts and uncles. And we’re doing some sort of voluntary gift-card grab-bag exchange thing for those who want to bring something.

This year is also the year of a holiday resurgence among my girlfriend’s family, meaning we have an extra stop to make on Christmas Eve. Which will be fine and really fun, but oh-my-god the logistics.

What’s really hit me, though, is how un-Christmasy my own life is. I own no Christmas lights. I own no Christmas tree. Most of my Christmas ornaments are the Batman ornaments that my mom has been giving me on St. Nicholas Day for as long as I can remember. Those are tucked away in a box in my parents’ basement, because ornaments weren’t first on my “To Be Moved” list when I came to Door County in April.

Detached from my family, the early days of December have begun to feel simply ordinary.

But as much as things have changed, and as much Christmas as it feels like I’ve lost somewhere along the way, I can’t help but get excited as the calendar edges towards the 25th. I’m going to see aunts and uncles and cousins that I haven’t seen since, probably, last year. I’m going to be able to check in with my brother and sister-in-law to see how my soon-to-be-born niece is doing. And I’ll get to sit in my living room and watch TV series with my dad until we get yelled at to go to bed.

A lot of the trappings of my Christmases have changed, and they’re going to continue to. But as long as I get to spend it with the people I love, Christmas will still be Christmas.