Manners Matter: Friend’s Silence Mystifies

Dear Mary Pat,

My best friend isn’t speaking to me at the moment. She got really upset about something that I supposedly said or did, but she won’t tell me what it is. I’ve called her, texted her and stopped by her house, but she won’t respond to me at all, and it’s been three weeks. I’ve been racking my brain to think of what I could have possibly done to upset her this much, and I’m totally in the dark. She did this to me once before, and it was over something so trivial that I couldn’t believe it. It took a few months for us to get back on track after that. How can I get through to her?



Sturgeon Bay, Wisconsin

Dear Mystified,

It doesn’t sound like you can get through to her. If your conscience is clear and you really don’t think you’ve done anything wrong, then you have to let it go. You might also have to let your “best” friend go. Does getting mad at someone, then not telling that person why seem reasonable to you? It sure doesn’t to me. I could understand if she wasn’t ready to talk to you for a day or so, but ignoring you completely is very immature and not the act of a true friend. It might be time to reevaluate your relationship and decide whether you can handle being around someone who punishes you with silence for no apparent reason.

Good luck,

Mary Pat