Manners Matter: Jan. 29, 2016

Dear Mary Pat,

My husband has always been a good driver up until about six or seven months ago. In the 43 years we’ve been married, I would say he always had the tendency to go too fast versus too slow. He has done a complete about face and has become a total slow poke. It’s not a huge deal around our home here in Door County. I think people are used to cars going slowly with visitors checking out the scenery. At our other home in Milwaukee, however, it is a little more concerning with all the merging and lane changes. I’m more than nervous when he’s driving now. He’s as sharp as a tack in every other area of his life. Is there a good way to tell him to speed it up?


Life in the Slow Lane

Milwaukee, Wis.


Dear Life in the Slow Lane,

If I could summarize my response with a road sign it would be: Proceed With Caution. There isn’t going to be a perfect way to tell him about your concerns but the best time would be when he’s not behind the wheel. Wait until he has your complete attention at the dinner table one night. Approach the topic with delicacy and remember that he might become a little defensive. No one wants to hear criticism of their driving, especially if it is perceived to be a change of getting older. Tell him honestly of your concerns and don’t accuse. If you come at it from a safety angle, that would be best. Remind him that driving too slowly can also cause accidents. You’ve been together a long time, I’m sure you’ll find the right words.

Good luck,

Mary Pat

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