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Overheard and Pet Peeves: Feb. 19, 2016

OVERHEARD

Are there tid-bits of conversations you’ve heard while standing in line at the grocery store, serving a table, or walking down the sidewalk that make you smile, cringe or laugh out loud?

 

“Life’s really sad when you don’t have coffee.”

 

“This does not work. I tried it at band camp.”

 

“What is the point of birds? All they do is yell.”

 

“I’m trying to make a life-ruining decision.”

 

“What if you have split personalities and you hate both of them?”

 

“My landlord kind of reminds me of my exes – never replies to my texts and has no idea how to fix anything.”

 

“Don’t worry, you will be alone every other day of the year too.”

 

PET PEEVES

 

People who insist on using the word utilize. It doesn’t sound smart. It sounds bureaucratic. If you don’t understand why its use is so painful on sensitive ears, consider the instructions that come with new products, popularly known as a “user manual.” In Newspeak it becomes a “utilizer manual,” and that’s a mushy mouthful of nothing.

 

Conversations with people who have no original ideas and just repeat talking points that they heard on the news.

 

People who use the term “research” when it’s clear all they did was Google something.

 

Pronunciation of “especially” as “expecially.”

 

Johnny Manziel, Beyoncé and Cam Newton.

 

Be a part of the Pulse! Send over your SHOUT OUTS, OBSESSIONS, OVERHEARDS, or PET PEEVES to [email protected] with one of the above categories in the subject line…and, let us know if you’d prefer the submission be printed anonymously.

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