…that people don’t think for themselves?

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“Why Is It…?” was designed by Dr. Steiner to address readers’ questions about human behavior from a social psychological perspective in order to inform and stimulate dialogue about the ways in which our thoughts, feelings and behaviors are influenced by the presence of other people. Dr. Steiner holds a Ph.D. in Applied Social Psychology. In addition to working as a university professor over the last 15 years, she conducts individual and group consultations in matters of social relationships and behavior. Readers are invited to submit their questions anonymously in one paragraph or less to Dr. Steiner at [email protected].

Q:  Why is it that people don’t think for themselves? I know many people who simply follow the lead of others. Instead of expressing themselves as individuals, these people seem to blindly imitate the way others dress, think and behave.

A:  The dynamic you’re describing is referred to as conformity and is the subject of great interest to social psychologists, politicians, consumer behavior specialists and any benefactor of social influence. The tendency for humans to conform to the standards of others is profound, highly predictable and often deliberately stimulated to lead the masses into certain mindsets and behaviors for political or financial gain. While it is true that each person is unique, the effects of conformity lead us to forego our individuality in favor of a larger group identity.

Considering that humans are social animals, they are highly influenced by the presence and reactions of others. Our basic need for recognition from and affiliation with others often trumps our personal need for self-expression. In essence, we want to be liked and accepted by others – and to this end – will go to great lengths to mold ourselves accordingly. There are countless theories as to why people conform to others, but one reliable explanation has to do with three basic social elements:  strength, immediacy and number.

Strength has to do with the perceived power of social role models. The higher the status role models possess, the more likely we are to conform to their standards and behavior. Celebrities, athletes and political and religious figures are often sources of social power. But any individual that we respect, admire or fear possesses the strength to gain our conformity (parents, teachers, or that all popular kid in high-school).

The second factor of immediacy has to do with how close a role model is to us physically. The greater the immediacy – the greater the conformity. Face-to-face interactions are more likely to trigger conformity than more distant forms of communication (like email or print media). Most of us have experienced this dynamic in our daily lives. For example, it’s usually easier to toss a junk-mail solicitation in the trash than it is to close the door in the face of a visiting salesman. Along these same lines, if we engage role-models on a daily basis (at work, home or school) we are more likely to conform than if we see them occasionally on television or in magazines.

The third element relates to the sheer number of social role models we encounter. The greater the number – the greater our willingness to conform. For example, if only one person displays a certain behavior, we may not be swayed. However, if most people in our social contexts follow the same trend in clothing, values and behaviors, we are more likely to conform to the pressure of our peers. This is not a dynamic reserved exclusively for teen-agers. Adults and children alike are prone to conformity when presented with great numbers of people who share or exhibit similar qualities.

The basic idea is that most of us would prefer to “go-along-to-get-along” than be considered the “odd-man-out.” Of course, we all seek attention and recognition from others, but when that attention is due to our “distinctiveness” as individuals – we fear separation and exclusion from the group. It takes strength of character and a healthy degree of self-esteem and confidence to go against the social current. To avoid the chance of social rejection, many people will conceal their genuine thoughts and feelings, and present an “image” that they believe is more socially acceptable to others (see 7/18/08 column for more specific details).

While conformity may be the social path of least resistance, it comes with the risk of minimizing/losing the value of our individuality. Blindly following “trend-setters” in ideologies, fashion or materialism dulls our ability to think critically about our choices and the world around us. We may become increasingly dependent upon looking to others when making decisions – rather than thinking for ourselves. This is especially true when others are in positions of status/authority, great numbers or close in proximity.

When feeling the need to conform, ask yourself the following questions:  Are you conforming because of a sincere change in personal views – or are you simply attempting to gain or avoid social rewards or rejection? It’s always best to remain true to yourself as opposed to blending in like a chameleon to the ever-changing color of the social background.