What We (I) Do In Winter and the Days of the Blackbird

With the extreme cold this week, I dug around in my old columns looking for things I wrote about winter and cold. It should come as no surprise that – after all these years of writing – I found quite a few columns. So here are two items from a long time ago: Item #1 comes from January of 1998 and Item #2 comes from January of 1997.

Item #1: Among the responsibilities which come with the writing of this weekly column is attempting, wherever possible, to research the real story behind the glimpses of information that flashes before our eyes everyday. One of my missions is to pursue stories of a perplexing or mysterious nature and to write about my discoveries in this column, thereby sparing you, my dear readers, the bothersome task of researching yourself or, worse, resorting to speculation.

Early this week, just such a story leapt off the television screen. As Barb and I sat on the couch perusing various reading matter, we also glanced periodically at CNN Headline News. Lo and behold, during a commercial break on this fine and reputable station, I caught the slightest portion of an ad offering financing for hair replacement procedures. Okay, this sounds stupid, even idiotic (to put a fine point on it); nonetheless, I am not making this up!

As I write this, it is Saturday, Jan. 10, and it is cold enough outside that a certain portion of my anatomy has completely vanished. In these conditions, the bookstore has become rather…quiet. While other clerks might find themselves at a loss in such circumstances, I wear many hats, thus I find ways to occupy my time. Thinking of you, dear readers, I pick up the phone and call 1.888.HAIR.LOAN.

(I should note, before I tell you the outcome of this call that I am not in need of hair replacement at my present stage of life. In the appropriate areas I am blessed with a sufficient growth and all other areas have managed without coverage for 40 years.)

My first attempt resulted in a busy signal. Immediately I fretted that another reporter was attempting to scoop my story. After hanging up the phone, however, I realized I was probably just suffering from delusions brought on by ennui.

On my second attempt…I got through!

The voice of the other end of the line greeted me with “Hair Replacement Funding Group” and then, without a pause, asked me to spell my first name. The voice asked me to spell my last name. It asked for my address. It asked for my phone numbers, both home and business. It asked for my date of birth. It asked my annual income. It asked for my social security number. Here I drew the line. I was not about to give my Social Security number out to a complete stranger – even for you, my dear readers.

When I balked at the Social Security number request the voice put me on hold for several minutes. When the voice returned it asked for a reconfirmation of my annual income and then informed me that someone would “call within 24 hours” to tell me whether my application was accepted. That was it! I couldn’t even get a word in, much less any questions.

So now I await a call and I am fearful. My fear, however, is probably not what you expect. I am not afraid of being accepted. I am not afraid of being rejected. I am not even afraid of being discovered as a reporter snooping into a story. No, my fear is much more mundane.

You see, right now, I am dreadfully afraid that some poor unsuspecting tourist will wander into the store in the next day or two and, in an attempt to be pleasant, will ask me what I do in Door County in the winter.

God…I’m going to look like…well…an idiot.

Item #2: On a completely different subject, children’s author and artist Tomie dePaola has a new book out titled The Days of the Blackbird. If you don’t know his books, many of you may know dePaola from the exhibition of his art at the Miller Art Museum, not long ago.

In any case, his new book is wonderful – in my opinion the best story he has done in some time (his artwork is always exceptional). I won’t give away the plot of the story, but the title comes from an intriguing background.

It seems that in the Piedmont region of Italy, Jan. 29, 30 and 31 are considered the coldest days of the year and they call these the Days of the Blackbird. Out of curiosity, I looked back to these particular days in the day ledger at the bookstore (where, in addition to information like sales figures, my Dad and I note the weather conditions twice each day).

For those who have forgotten, last year [1996] we had a serious cold snap here in northeast Wisconsin…which happened to coincide with the onset of the Days of the Blackbird. On the morning of Jan. 29 the temperature was -8 at 7:30 am. The next day, at the same time, the temperature was -18; and on Jan. 31 it was -14 (I might quickly note that Feb. 1 last year was the coldest of the cold at -26).

Here’s hoping for a balmy 0 degrees on each of the next few days.