Overheards, Shout Outs and Pet Peeves

OVERHEARD

Are there tid-bits of conversations you’ve heard while standing in line at the grocery store, serving a table, or walking down the sidewalk that make you smile, cringe or laugh out loud?

“That’s because cell phone towers make pancakes.”

“I think all he does is Internet.”

“You want the romance to stay alive in our relationship? Don’t fart on my hand while I’m grabbing your butt!”

“Balls and nuts are inappropriate trigger-words.”

“Let’s see his nipples – we’ll know if he’s cold or not.”

“The taxi driver compared our work to the Pope tonight, so that’s a success.”

“I do like it when you call me Big Poppa.”

“Thank god Pat fixed my stack!”

“Santa has a very big clock.”

“You’ve got the personality of a frickin’ firehawk.”

“You are the Julia Child of prostitutes.”

“The best way to get from here to there? Frolic.”

“‘Happy Holidays.’ ‘You mean Merry Christmas, otherwise the terrorists win.’ ‘Oh, yeah. Merry Christmas!’”

“Keeping animals alive is easier than knitting.”

SHOUT OUTS

Is there someone or something that deserves a pat on the back or a slap on the wrist?

“Thank you, Lisa, for your amazing patience in taking on the task of teaching the Pulse girls to knit. I will finish that scarf… someday!” ~ Jess Farley

“Shout out the Door County firefighters who responded to the flames at The Ephraim Inn on the frigid morning of December 30. We are proud of all of you!” ~ Staff of the Peninsula Pulse

“Shout out to the county snow crews who were out at odd hours to keep the roads mostly clear for Christmas travelers.” ~ Easy Rider

PET PEEVES

Is there something that really irks you, gets your goat, rubs you the wrong way, drives you up the wall, gets you bent out of shape, puts a stick in your craw, or makes you want to throw in the towel?

“My brother hates it when people call him ‘bud’ or ‘buddy.’ I share his sentiment, taking it as a more or less inferior way to address someone else. For example: ‘Hey, bud!’ (I’m older and more experienced than you and you’re in the social class known as the buds.) ‘How’s it goin’…bud?’” ~ I’m Not Your Buddy, Bud

“Waking up without a pillow, turning to see my cat sleeping square in the middle of it. How did that sneaky cat maneuver that?” ~ Touche, Cat. Touche.

Be a part of the Pulse! Send over your SHOUT OUTS, OBSESSIONS, OVERHEARDS, or PET PEEVES to [email protected] with one of the above categories in the subject line…and, let us know if you’d prefer the submission be printed anonymously.